Self-Love, The Most Important Love

Have you made any half-hearted attempts to create healthier eating habits in the past? Some changes here, and some improvements there?

Maybe you’ve even followed a program to the letter, done everything they asked of you, but unfortunately, the results you hoped for didn’t last long or show themselves at all.

Later, you’ll get to know a previous client who experienced the latter.

Everything starts with self-love.

But first, I have to be honest with you. These types of articles: “Self-Love”, “How to Love Yourself”, “Put Yourself First”, and so on, were always the ones I skipped reading in those magazines back in the day.

I simply found them too cliché! 

Today, I know better.

Through my experience in working with lifestyle changes, I've come to realise that everything starts with loving yourself.

You see, self-criticism can be a massive roadblock in achieving your goals. By realising your self-worth, you'll find the inner strength to start prioritising your needs and taking action that leads to success.

The million-dollar question is: What do I need to do, and how much self-love exactly is necessary?

Mary’s Weight Loss Story

On that note, I want to introduce you to a previous client of mine, let’s call her Mary. A single mom in her 40’s, who according to the BMI (body mass index) was obese and wanted help to lose weight.

Before even entering her hallway, she struck me as a lively and caring person, with lunch ready on the table and a hot cuppa in my hand.

We had a good chat about her diet, and I realised she already had several good habits intact. She was physically active, doing aerobics twice a week, hiking once a week, and taking short walks now and then, and I thought this case would be pretty straightforward.

Despite good eating habits and exercise routines, something wasn’t right.

What was not working? I asked her about relationships and if she was happy. A part of me was prepared for those tears down her cheeks, but not the reason behind it.

I came to learn that Mary had left a physically and mentally abusive relationship, which resulted in her never feeling good enough and constantly doubting herself.

What Mary truly needed was to find the self-love she deserved.

“The greatest gift you can give the people around you, is to love yourself.”

How To Start Prioritise Yourself (Measure Success)?

How come it’s so much easier taking care of everyone else than doing the right things for ourselves? Even though Mary’s story stands out from my regular clients’, I believe that many of us share the same struggle of overcoming external stressors that prevent us from achieving our goals and practising self-love.

One major stress factor is definitely high demands from society:

Earn more money!

Exercise harder!

Build a bigger house!

Buy another car!

Climb that career ladder!

Eat healthier food!

Do you agree? Have you noticed these outer pressures too?

It’s like your achievements are never good enough. There’s always room for improvement. Since perfect doesn’t exist, it can be extremely challenging to know when we should be satisfied with all our accomplishments.

“(…) you’ll be chasing a happiness that doesn’t exist for the rest of your life”

So, right here and right now, I want you to decide how you measure success. Is it a feeling of happiness? Maybe wearing certain clothes? Or going to a birthday party and not overeating?

If you don’t determine what those measurements look like to you, you’ll be chasing a happiness that doesn’t exist for the rest of your life.

Even if success looks like a triathlon or 5 kilometres, it doesn’t matter! These are YOUR measurements, and the only ones you need to associate yourself with.

This, my friend, is next-level self-love!

Why? When you decide what success is to you, you’ll also discover great things you’re already doing (trust me, you are!). When you experience a sense of achievement, it is when the ball starts rolling.

You start seeing reasons why you should invest time and energy in yourself. Issues you thought were impossible to handle are suddenly within reach.

Now, go and achieve those goals of yours!